Cruise Contol

I am going to interrupt my ongoing China blog to catch you up to speed with my real life When I came home from the cruise, I decided it was time to get back in the game, so I went on the ever dreaded dating site, match.com. After I had filled out all the questionnaires that would make up my profile, and hit send I regretted it. Do I really want to go through all this again? Well no sooner do I hit send then the winks start coming in. For those of you not in the date site loop, a wink on match is to let someone know you are interested in them. The first wink come from someone in Arizona. I let him down gently by letting him know with the cost of fuel on the rise I wasn't filling my Lear jet as often as I was. I figure if I couldn't make a go of it with someone down the street, Arizona was out of the question. Match is sooo different from e-harmony, in that people are in contact with you right away. A friend of mine described it as, drinking water from a fire hose. After a few "put me out of my misery" phone conversations, and abrupt e-mails concerning my rudeness, I wondered what the hell I had gotten myself into. ....and then there was Tom.

Out At Sea

For the first day and 1/2 we were out in the South China Sea. The weather was brisk and damp, so laying by the pool was not an option.....actually being outside was not an option. There are plenty of other things to do while on board. Maura opted to learn bridge, I went to a yoga class and then to a group trivia challenge. These activities were replayed each day we were at sea. They also had an ongoing puzzle, 3 revolving movie choices that played in your suite, and any other wheelchair bound activity you can imagine. They had a spa on board, but Maura and I both agreed we would look for the $12.00 massage in town, as opposed to the $160.00 on board.
Our 2nd evening on board was the Formal Night, and Maura and I had been invited to sit at the Co-Captain's table. Now when I say formal, I mean the men were in black tie and the ladies dressed to the 9's. I wore a red dress, and just keep putting on faux pearls. When I go on holiday it is not to dress up and wear my best baubles. When traveling to a 3rd world country I don't even bring my real gems.....anyway, dinner was delicious.
After dinner, which ended at 10:00pm, we went to watch a magic show. Maura took us up to the front row, and everyone knows what happens when you sit in the front row. This magician was very different from the one I assisted in my early 20's. He was more into card tricks, then pulling rabbits out of hats, and sawing women in half. Well surprise, surprise in his third set he asks for my assistance. I have never been shy in front of a crowd, so up I go. I, of course, am still in my formal wear which includes 3 1/2 inch heels. I get in front of the crowd and am wobbling with every pitch of the boat. I say "Oh, I'm a bit tippy", well the crowd loves it, thinking I meant to say "tipsy". The magician runs with it, so the rest of the show I think the crowd is more interested in whether I'm going to fall or not. Maura and I were the only 2 who knew I hadn't had a drop to drink.

All Aboard.

I have been on 5 or 6 cruises, and as a rule they are not my favorite form of travel. The Seabourn Cruise Line is by far the nicest Cruise Line I have been on. The bedrooms were actually suites, a sleeping area, as well as a sitting area. The closet was a walk in, and the bathroom had a sunken marble tub. For having to be in the same room for 2 weeks, this was not

a bad place to be.

Where???

Maura and I get back to the hotel with enough time to question the concierge, hop in a cab and go to one of the nicest "Foot Salons" in Hong Kong. At least that's what we thought. When the cab dropped us off, there was a small Chinese woman with fliers for foot massage, along with any other type of massage you may have been looking for. Why would she need to advertise right in front of her own salon? In the universal sign for follow me, Maura and I did. We both assumed she was taking us to the Foot Palace, but why is it so far from where the cab let us off? We followed her for about 1/4 mile and thought maybe we should have kept the cab. I have no doubt that if we had been much younger, we would now be at the feet of some Sultan in Dubai.
We finally make it to a Foot Place as opposed to Palace. What a difference a letter makes. We both sat down and began a 45 minute foot and leg massage. As massages go, it wasn't too bad.
Maura's masseur spoke english and explained all the pressure points as he worked on her. I, of course, just smiled and shook my head. By the end of this trip I will be know as a Bobble Head. The last 10 minutes we got a neck and shoulder massage. Maura's neck wasn't right for the rest of the trip.